Saturday, February 2, 2013

Juice Plus

I think the further we get into technology and short cuts and what not, the more we move away from the basics which causes us to move further and further away from our health.
We take diet pills to get skinny
We mass produce foods and use chemicals to make them bigger
We created fast food restaurants because we have become too lazy to cook

in turn

Our medical bills are larger
Cancer is more prevalent
Quality of life and health, sub par
Bode and I have always been huge proponents of eating from the earth and natural and fresh food.  But we have found that while on the road and living on a boat in Southern California, we too are forced to eat out and not as healthy as we normally would.  When we are in New Hampshire, it's so much easier considering Bode has his organic farm and there isn't a restaurant anywhere near home.
So in an effort to continue living our healthy life style, we found Juice Plus.
I can't even begin to tell you how amazed I have been by the positive reactions our bodies and our friends and family's bodies have taken to Juice Plus.
More Energy
Better Digestion
More Sound Sleep
Healthier Skin
(I feel like an infomercial right now)
But I am not even kidding
Even though we think we are eating healthy and getting all of our vitamins from the fruits and veggies we buy in the grocery store, we're not.
Nothing is ever vine ripened that we purchase in the stores which results in a large amount of nutrients being eliminated from our food.
Not to mention the amount of nutrients we lose when we cook our food as well!
Anyways, (just so everyone has an idea what's in these pills) Juice Plus vine ripens all of their fruits, vegetables and berries.  Once everything has fully ripened, the entire fruit is turned into a juice and then placed into a 105 degree oven to slowly dehydrate.  This temperature is ideal because it eliminates the sugars, salt and gluten all while maintaining the integrity of the vitamins and enzymes that our bodies need for a raw diet.
It's straight, organic produce via a couple pills.
Plus, it's the only pill that has a nutrition label instead of a supplement label.
It's the new daily vitamin.  The new prenatal vitamin.
It's pretty much the key to health while living in such an unhealthy society.
One of the coolest facts that I have been most impressed by is that the pill doesn't need to be digested, it goes straight into our blood stream, so it has been super beneficial for people with Crohn's disease.
I really encourage everyone to try it and read up on it.
I'm literally in love.
And, I can't believe we are doing this and we have been getting some pretty funny phone calls, but to learn more, you need to call Bode.
I'll have my sticks ready to beat off those crazy women
+1 (508) 565 8270
You can also order using the link to my personal Juice Plus page on the right of your screen.

Thursday, January 24, 2013

Bode and I made it back safe and sound.
Even though this trip was for work, we had so much fun just getting away.
A majority of the time I was in bed.  
This process has been not only emotionally draining but physically draining and terrifying as well.  I convinced myself I was dying a few times.
In my mind I just kept thinking, "there is NO WAY this process is normal."
Well, guess what.....it is.

One of the few nights we were there, Bode and I felt it was necessary to continue to live life.
To have some fun.
To make each other smile.
So, after much encouraging on Bode's part, he managed to drag me down to a little restaurant called "The Velvet room."
THE ENTIRE ROOM WAS VELVET!
Dark red, crushed velvet.
We opened some wine and laughed and ate some absolutely terrible food.
We then thought going to a bar for some drinks to just unwind would be an evening well spent.  So off we went, down the streets of Kitzb├╝hel over to some little hole in the wall bar.  Bode even opted to take the challenge of teaching me how to play pool.
WE HAD SO MUCH FUN!
We laughed, we drank (probably a little too much), we danced all over the bar (and by danced I mean shook our bodies to the beat of the song that played previously to the one we were actually dancing to), we attempted to play pool against some locals who were grateful to be done due to my unsportsmanlike behavior.  I thought shimmying behind the hole they were aiming for would help their focus.  And the best part was that Bode and I were the only two in the bar for a majority of the night.  I think we scared everyone else away.
Needless to say, we spent the next day in bed reminiscing of a fantastic night and laughing.
It was so great to just distract ourselves from the sadness we have been feeling.
Even though I still sob at the sight or sound of a baby, I just remind myself that life and happiness is still very much in my blood and my heart.  My spirit is not broken.  Plus, I have my best friend with me every day.
Just some more reassurance that we are okay.

Also,
THANK YOU
THANK YOU
THANK YOU
to everyone who has been there to keep picking us back up.
We are so lucky for the people who have been so kind and shared their wisdom and love.

Sunday, January 20, 2013

Just Getting Back Up

Writing....
it clears my mind
it soothes my soul
and I feel it's so important to connect with people who may have or may be going through similar things.
I wish I had been more involved and more persistent with my postings.  Writing brings me to a happier place.

So as most people know, the last few months have been ummmmmm, how do I put this?
INSANE!
Exciting, but totally just "fly by the seat of my pants" insane.
It all started when.....
I met the love of my life (I didn't know it at first)
and...
We got engaged
We got married
We got pregnant
We bought a house
We moved onto a boat
and have been traveling non stop
along with a lot of other things that are not so fabulous and quite frankly, they break my heart.
But we have learned that life is no joke and sometimes it really hurts.  
The promises and commitments we made (through good and bad and all that other jazz) have been tested.
Like seriously tested.
We have screamed at each other
We have ignored each other
We have even thrown food and called each other names. 
But what makes all these horrible times seem so insignificant, is that without fail, we rise to the occasion.  And the bigger the issue, the more we come together as a unit and the better we seem to handle the situation.
It's the who's going to clean the cat box? or which football game are we going to watch? that really sends us into the craziest and most pointless arguments which we usually end up laughing about anyways.
But what brings me to this post is one of the most difficult things Bode and I have faced together.
11 weeks and a couple days into all the excitement and pure joy of building our new little family, we lost our baby.
I don't even know how to express the initial feeling of not seeing a heartbeat on the monitor other than total panic, helplessness and the hope that the guy doing the ultrasound was actually the security guard from the front desk.
I begged him to check again, and again, and again.
All we could do was place our hands on my belly and tell our little one that we love him and we are so sorry and then we said goodbye.
I would do almost anything to change that day just to see life in what I've come to love and call "my little peanut." 
But I know and have always believed that everything happens for a reason. 
Right now it may seem like total cruelty and torture and it makes me want to stomp my feet on the ground and cry and think that life is so unfair, but I know we will have a beautiful family one day.  I know that this was yet, another test.  And I also know that we are going to be okay.


One last thing....I'm asking for help.
I've mentioned how therapeutic writing has been for me but I struggle to find the motivation and creativity to write.  So please...
ask questions
throw out topics
I look forward to connecting

Saturday, December 8, 2012

Bode and I ended our retreat at Grace Grove on our 2 months wedding anniversary.  It couldn't have been more perfect.  We left happy and rejuvenated and even closer than before.  It was one of the most spectacular trips I have ever been on and one of the most beneficial leaps of faith I've taken.  I'm excited for the future and not at all nervous for the hurdles Bode and I have coming up.  I now have the tools to deal with them with grace and love and be able to show compassion.  
I learned that a majority of the baggage that I carried wasn't mine and I've come to love and understand who I am....every single part of my crazy little self along with all the crazy decisions I've ever made.  I learned that our plan isn't always THE plan and that adjustment and going with the flow when life throws you major curve balls is absolutely necessary.  I've also learned that the cure to every problem, even if it's not what we want to do, is UNCONDITIONAL LOVE (as hippy dippy as that sounds it's so true)  I encourage everyone to do some research on this place and maybe, if you have the time, try it.  It's impossible to leave without benefitting.

I am so absolutely excited to be heading home tomorrow.  I do miss stability and familiar places.  I am looking forward to cleaning out the boat and getting it listed so we can move into our dream home!

Tuesday, December 4, 2012

Today is the first physically AND mentally challenging day to be here.
The rest of the days were just mentally challenging.
I am growing and learning and facing things I never wanted to face....
....but now i'm hungry.....
really really hungry and all I can think about is a big fat cheese burger from In N Out
My butt is a little sore from sitting nonstop and I just have the urge to sleep all the time.  
But sleep during the day means no sleep at night, which I experienced last night.
The hunger and deprivation of sleep is resulting in me being a little bit resistant and a tad bit irritable.

Now on the positive side, yesterday, Bode and I got to work on our relationship.  
Learn to become more of a team.  
Learn what it meant to give unconditional love instead of conditional love.  
As much as I hate to admit it, I was much more of the conditional love kinda person whereas no matter what shit storm Bode and I had just gone through, he still loved me just as much as he did before.....AND HE SHOWED IT!  
We worked through little things that rubbed us the wrong way and figured out what triggered each other.
We gained new tools on how to approach certain situations and how to appreciate and love better than we already do.
But here's what made me the happiest....when Anahata (the leader of this meeting) showed us what it meant to be in a conscious and healthy relationship and bullet pointed the necessary qualities to succeed, Bode and I were almost right on with every bullet point.

Later in the evening, we had a chocolate ceremony.  I was so excited to get to eat chocolate that I raced out and sat down and waited to receive a little piece of goodness.  Well, guess what, it was a raw cacao nut with a little bit of vanilla bean and chili's brewed together into a tea. 
Not what I was expecting.
But it's what kicked off our "Dance of Liveration"
After our "chocolate ceremony," everyone picked a card from the display in front of us.  Each card held a word and an image.  With that word we could apply it to what we wanted or needed from the spirits or we could come up with our own prayer.  Everyone was then blindfolded and lights turned low.  Music began to play and our job as the pioneer's of our own journey was to dance, without judgement, and create the physical expression of our prayer.  I couldn't stop laughing because I just kept thinking of how Bode would be dancing.
Little fairy wings and spinning all over the place is the image I played in my head for his chosen style of dance.
At first, it all seemed so silly....until I picked my card.  It was dead on.
FORGIVENESS
in big bold letters across the top of my card.
Holy (*&^R%()*^&)(**(*&%$!!&&(*!!!!!!!!!
It couldn't have been more perfect.  
I didn't connect to the dance as much as some of the others, but when we gathered again at the end to share our individual experiences, it was spooky how everyone's cards directly connected to the journey they were trying to lead.
Bode's card read
SACRED UNION
which then showed two trees with separate roots joining into one trunk and all branches intertwining.
It was incredible to see how this connection between prayer and dance blasted some of our Grace Grove family into a new place.
Places of hope.
Places of understanding.
Places of pure joy and healing.

There is something very special about this place.

Monday, December 3, 2012

No makeup.  Sweats. Wet hair.
This has been my kind of place.  I have slowly come into my own at Grace Grove and have tried to experience each lesson coming in as raw as I can.  
Let me tell you something, being raw sucks.  
It's hard. 
I cry. 
I'm scared. 
I have to face so many internal and emotional issues that I have tried to push away for years.  
But it's empowering.
And it's real.
So now it's day two and I feel some clarity.
I'm hungry, that's no doubt, but I feel lighter (emotionally)
or because part of this journey includes multiple colonics.
TMI, I know.
But I've left baggage at doors and I've gotten perspective.
I feel braver and happier.....
Like truly happy.  It's no longer a choice.  It just is.
And I am so incredibly grateful to get to go through this experience with Bode.
Life right now, is beautiful.

Saturday, December 1, 2012


I'm sitting on a plane tens of thousands of feet up in the air.  
That's one thing in my life that hasn't changed.  I still frequent airports more often than I do my own bed.  
I left Beaver Creek this morning around 4:30 am and headed down to Denver to catch my flight to Phoenix.  It was so hard to peel my husbands arms from around my body and scoot out of the warm bed.  I didn't think I had that much will power.  Needless to say, regretfully, I am sitting on this plane headed to Phoenix instead of enjoying the rest of the festivities in Beaver Creek.
Not to mention I am a little bit sad because I will be away from Bode for 30 hours!
30 HOURS!
It's pretty much the longest we've been apart in months.
Shit, 3 hours is pretty much the longest we've been apart.
Pathetic, I know.  But i'm already so excited to see him tomorrow.  I've been plotting in my head how I will successfully jump into his arms tomorrow without knocking him over.  So far i've failed with every mental game plan of keeping him in an upright position.
(get your mind out of the gutter)
So why is it so important that I leave early?
Bode and I have decided to do a health and wellness retreat down in Sedona, AZ.  It's called Grace Grove.  Some friends raved about their experience and said it was life changing.  Not only physically, but emotionally, mentally, and spiritually.  Quite honestly, I'm terrified.  I already feel way too vulnerable just being on this plane.  It's like i'm one step closer to fully committing to bearing my soul to people I have never met with the hopes of…….I don't even know.
So again, here's to new life experiences and throwing my arms up in the air with a "here goes nothing" attitude.
Grace Grove, show me what you've got.

Oh yeah, and Happy December!