Sunday, January 15, 2012

Morgan Beck Squared

I absolutely love connecting with fans and reading fan mail.  However, lately I have been receiving letters that have images attached asking for autographs.
Awesome!  Reasonable enough request. 
I normally expect the usual athletic shot of me crushing a ball or screaming mid victory with the opponent crying into their hands on the other side of the net (I don't have an image like that but I can vividly picture it in my head so it exists) so when people look back at that autographed image, they just may remember what it is I do.
But I guess that just seems to make too much sense.  Instead I have been receiving bikini clad, provocatively posed, cleavage popping out of all seams types of images.
Now I know what you are thinking...."It's your fault! If you don't want people sending you those images then DON'T TAKE THEM (insert thought bubble here calling me some whorish name).  
Here's the catch....The images that I am being asked to sign are NOT EVEN OF ME!
Does it look like I would be able to jump out of the sand with those tig ol' bitties?
NO!
Does it look like this girl is even an athlete?
NO!
It looks like she has never lifted and weight in her life.
Okay, she's pretty so that is flattering and her name just so happens to be Morgan Beck as well, but don't be sending me letters claiming you're my #1 fan AND YOU DON'T EVEN KNOW WHAT I LOOK LIKE!

So for those fans (who just so happen to be middle aged men) who are waiting to receive these images back in the mail with a pretty little signature and a kissy mark next to my John Hancock, you now know why you will never see those pictures again.

But thanks for being fans